Mar 13, 2015 - Communication    1 Comment

I can tell you now

I can tell you now, footballers get paid a ridiculous amount of money for something so little. They kick a ball around the field once in a while then they can relax, then we see people who save life’s and help the needy; people who take family time out if there needed, always wanting to help, getting paid so much less. This disappoints me, the way they get paid for running around a field for 90 minutes, then we have a genuine person who’s working hard to do the best they can for the people in this world. I understand, the talent of a footballer is big, but the work ethic of some people knock spots of a footballer. The media just annoys me, they will rather put a footballer player who scored a goal or a footballer that got sent off rather then someone who made that extra move to keep a person on earth, the media, the people of today have got a completely wrong view on everything.

If we look at for an example a nurse and a famous footballer for instance, Lionel Messi. The lifestyle of a nurse is not even comparable, Lionel Messi can afford to miss so many games and stay at home and still live well, a nurse has to work 100x harder and go to work everyday just to get by. This makes me upset, if I could have it my way I would switch the pay around. Back in the day footballers used to play for enjoyment, money wasn’t a motivation, it was all about playing and helping your own team out, now the money has rapidly increased, the enjoyment has gone for most footballers now its only about the money.

Surely everyone can see what I see, this world has got it wrong, I don’t see how the government finds this acceptable, lets take another example, a solider. Our soldiers put their life on the line, fight for this country to protect everyone else, and they earn less money in a year then a footballer would in a year. Even when the world see soldiers dying in their own blood, sweating of fright, their everyday job is a ticking death bomb, than there is footballers, who only sweat because there running around to much, there life isn’t on the line, don’t have to work as hard and then most footballers till complain about their life. A soldier who fights in Afghanistan doesn’t have a choice, the conditions doesn’t make a difference, they need to sleep no matter what and serve there country, where as footballers matches get cancelled if its too rainy, I can tell you, not one footballer could switch jobs with a solider. Soldiers don’t complain about this obvious injustice: ‘It’s not about the money, it’s about helping the country,’ said Harris Tamaki, a former soldier, displaying the kind of modesty you don’t see from some footballers, this is what footballers minds should be like, these soldiers cant guarantee to come back home, to see there kids again, and its upsetting, footballers don’t realise how good there life is.

1 Comment

  • Regan, this is a hugely improved draft. Very well done!

    Targets:

    1) You should work on your sentence structures. At times, your sentences are too long. You also sometimes use commas rather than full stops.

    2) Your paragraphs may need some restructuring – you need to ensure that each one has a clear point.

    3) Check your use of ‘their, there and they’re’.

    This would currently achieve: 28/40 (C3 )

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